There's a particular kind of dread that has nothing to do with not knowing what you think — it's not being sure you'll actually say it out loud when the moment comes.
Hold it before you speak, not during
Lapis lazuli is an emitter, traditionally associated with honesty and self-expression. The most common way it's used is holding a piece for a minute or two right before the conversation — a negotiation, a hard family talk, anything where staying quiet would be easier than speaking honestly.
Keep it close during, if it helps
Some people keep a small piece in a pocket through the conversation itself, less as a talisman and more as a physical reminder to stay honest rather than soften the truth to keep the peace.
Use it to prepare, not to script
It won't hand you the right words. What it's traditionally used for is the space right before you speak — sitting with it long enough to get clear on what you actually want to say, rather than what's easiest to say.
Reset it after big conversations
A night of moonlight every few weeks keeps it feeling clear, especially after a stretch of conversations that asked a lot of you.
If there's a conversation you've been circling, lapis lazuli is worth holding onto before you finally have it.